My eyes have finally stopped looking so puffy! Crying my way around a mountain bike race on Sunday was not my intention. Yet that is what happened and I am not proud of it.
My fiancé and I were at a mountain bike race in central New Zealand. He had entered me in the 3 hour race. The aim is to complete as many 7 kilometre laps in under 3 hours, most laps in the fastest time wins. Simple right?
Well, it is not so. There are also the 6 and 12 hour competitors going around the same forested loop; meaning lots of passing and congestion.
My tears came bubbling through my Oakley's when I lost my rag with everyone passing me. I am not the fastest mountain biker, I spend most of my time trying to stay on the easiest path, let alone having to move over and let others by. Being passed constantly for 3 hours was a big hit to my ego.
This got me thinking about how we often get beaten down in our business and feel like everyone else is passing us. It is easy to see someone putting out a new program and think ‘dam, I need to do that’. Or seeing some attention grabbing Facebook posts making you feel inadequate with yours. My favourite is when someone in the industry has rebranded and you look at your own thinking ‘mine looks so amateur’.
Simply put, this is the comparison hangover. We compare ourselves to the others and quickly come to the conclusion that our (insert comparison object or action here) is shit. We beat ourselves up and say we must do better or (insert action that will defiantly happen here).
I got it into my head that all these people passing me were better than me and I was going to be last and be an embarrassment to myself, my fiancé and our other friends at the event. I got so wound up that I got the tears that you start to choke on, all while still pedalling around the forest, lap after lap.
And you know what happened in the end? I wasn’t last, in fact I was fourth, only 2 little minutes off a podium third place. How silly am I right? If I had stayed focused on being the best I could in that moment I might have made up those 2 little minutes and got a shiny medal, to stand on the podium on stage and feel super proud.
So, how can you stop the comparison hangover in your life?
Here is my Top 10 to Combat Comparison list for you to use:
- Keep repeating mantra’s when you see something that makes you feel like you are behind where you want to be. e.g. I am on track, I am on track, I am on track.
- Know that you are enough no matter what everyone else is doing.
- Remind yourself that your path is right for you.
- Give yourself social media mini-breaks throughout the day.
- Make a list and actually tick some of it off. i.e. Take Action!
- Stop talking about what you are going to do and do it (refer to point 5).
- Journal. Pour it all out on paper instead of bitching to your friend. It means you won’t offend anyone while comparing, and you will have much greater clarity.
- Reflect on where you have come from in your biz. I bet it is further than you realise.
- Celebrate all wins, big or small. Some days this can be as simple as getting out of bed and working on your biz. Celebrate with a coffee and a fist pump.
- Keep being constant and persistent each day. You might even make up those 2 minutes and be on the podium yourself.
I know you have got this.
Here’s to no more puffy eyes!